An Affront!
Well . . . here's post #2 for the day because it really got me thinking!
By following blog links today, I stumbled on a writer who posted part of her book on her blog. And it got me thinking about word choice.
Because the character felt she was "affronted." And the word gave me pause.
Because, I have learned, you can distance your readers by word choice. When I am angry, I will say I am p*ssed, angry, furious, upset, distraught even. But I am never affronted.
If you want to know why single word choices are important--why every word is important . . . it boils down to what each word accomplishes. Choose a word that is too lofty and it pulls you out of the writing and into your head as reader. Get too passive when an active verb choice is better, and you load the prose down with unnecessary clutter--five words to say what two can do.
I believe it's better to be direct. Even better, I'd rather SHOW you how mad my character is. So angry she shakes? I don't know, when I am really, really mad and need to gain control, my voice shakes and my head hurts until I go and walk it off.
So . . . what do you think about word choices? Are there certain words that pull you out of the story?
12 comments:
Yes, but of course I can't think of one at the moment. One word that appears often on back cover copy, and, regrettably, irritates me so much that I instantly put the book down, is "for." As in, Jack Black was a haunted man. For he was a Marine with a past, a blah blah blah ....
I don't know why. I don't even know if it's correct or incorrect usage, but I know it irritates me, LOL.
Hi Spy:
Cliches usually stop me cold.
"Due to" is a pet peeve . . . .
I have a few others. :-)
E
Too many "that's" derail my concentration.
And reflective words like: ponders, considers, thinks, wonders, etc. drive me bonkers.
She pondered her dilemma. = What a freakin’ mess. What was a gal to do?
He considered his options. = Two options. One made sense. Too much sense. The second sucked. But then, the number two was his lucky number.
She thought about his broad shoulders and tight abs. = Square, broad shoulders entreating her to stroke and prod. Lean and tight and flat, his stomach dipped into waistband of his jeans, begging to be explored.
He wondered what it would be like to kiss her. = What would it be like to take her into his arms? To cover her full lips with his? To taste her? To kiss her until toes curled? (Oops, a wayward cliché'. Sorry!)
I’m not sure if I’m using the correct term, but words like that tend to feel intrusive to me, perhaps author intrusions.
To me, any word, phrase, sentence, etc., that might give the reader pause, is to be exterminated.
We're not here to show off our vocabulary, how pretty we can write. We're here to tell stories, entertain, keep the reader turning pages and maybe in a subtle way make some sort of thematic point.
Most of all, we're here to tap dance and give the reader a momentary diversion from reality s/he otherwise would not have had.
BTW, I've posted the first chapter of my wip on my blog. I would appreciate any comments/feedback/suggestions.
Thanks!
'My darling'...ack! gag! What modern man says that?
Too much repetition yanks me out as well. I just finished a story by a BIG name romance writer and in almost every chapter there was 'a couple' as in
- 'a couple times she'd been burned'
-he'd gone fishing a couple times'
-'a couple more days of work and she could afford a vacation'
Made me crazy! BUT, it did fatten up my 'what not to do' list. :)
Kathy:
Loved your examples. Much more concrete than mine!!! Excellent.
E
Jude:
Agreed. Not here to show off but to carry the reader somewhere else.
Great point!
E
lainey:
I sometimes cringe when I re-read and see a few lapses in repetition! It's something I always try to catch on revisions.
E
I would love to see a list of your pet peeves, Erica. I find I constantly need to "rehabilitate" myself. ;)
Hi Heather:
I'll blog about it next week . . . but then you will all think I am an anal-retentive b*tchy editor--because the only way to be an editor is to be anal-retentive and picky. :-)
E
Thanks, Erica. :)
Without hesitate, I bought Tibia Gold , in the game I can find myself. So I buy Tibia coins . At present, think the happy day I spend in tibia, I am eager to enter it, and buy Tibia money . Own tibia gp , it means that you own the life of happiness. So I will not leave Tibia Platinum .
Post a Comment