Clouds Go By
Two days ago, Demon Baby and I were outside. It was unseasonably warm. I lied down on the driveway, flat on my back, and stared up at the winter sky as clouds swam past. Demon Baby lifted up my shirt, and put his cheek on my belly and joined me. I don't know how long we stayed there, the two of us. I watched clouds. I stared at the outline of winter trees against a gray sky. I watched the birds. (My mom has been stringing popcorn and cranberries and we try to think of imaginative ways to leave them on the trees for the birds . . . they think this is brunch at the Ritz-Carlton).
And I thought about how I am often asked by kids about how to become a writer. And sure, there are bits of advice. Read. Keep a journal. And so on. But maybe I should say . . . have unscheduled time to watch clouds go by. Daydream. Don't overschedule yourself to death. Worry less about the fifty afterschool activities you seem to need to get into Harvard and worry more about being a good person and having time to just BE in the moment. That's when your imagination is unfettered.
Just be.
Maybe that's really the best advice.
Thoughts?
30 comments:
Reminds me of my favorite Wordsworth poem:
I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.
Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.
The waves beside them danced, but they
Out-did the sparkling leaves in glee;
A poet could not be but gay,
In such a jocund company!
I gazed—and gazed—but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:
For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.
Sounds like good advice, although we got 5 inches of snow last night, so I'm not so sure I want to go lie down and watch the clouds. Or maybe it's just snow angel time.
Yeah, I'd recommend that, too. Make lots of snow angels.
Jude:
Thank you. That made my day.
E
Mark:
Virginia, about every few years or so, gets a BIG snow storm. Not often. My kids PRAY for it. Snow angels are wonderful!
E
For some, it's harder to be in the moment than to multi-task, overschedule and be a supermom/parent. Because in addition to it meaning that you're spending time with someone or something else only, you're also just with yourself. Not always easy. I can't imagine life any other way -- oh wait -- yes I can. I just prefer it this way.
Over-programmed children is one of my biggest pet peeves. I can pick them out of crowds.
The rest is good advice.
I agree with Sex Scenes. I had after-school activities but only once or twice a week, and I was considered a well-rounded child. I feel so bad for kids these days that are dragged to multiple things per day. Playtime is important for developing creativity!
Hi Amy:
I think some people are afraid to be alone--in their own company.
E
Hi Sex Scenes:
My oldest is a classical violinist who begged me for a whole YEAR, when she was 3, for violin lessons. She was relentless. But then, with the exception of also having piano lessons, that was her thing--because any more and it would have just been too stressful. I think kids need to pursue just one or two activities and the rest of the time should be about being a kid.
E
Melanie:
I took piano lessons, which I hated. I did Brownies. That was about it.
E
Maybe I'm wrong, but I think most writers go through a stage where they try to imitate somebody. You have to get out of that and be yourself if you are ever going to write anything real.
I need some of that daydream right about now.
So true about the clouds! I've always had the most fun by just being. I've felt the rush and crunch in the past, and it stinks.
One day, I realized I could hear myself think again. Maybe it's the stage when your children are grown, and the grandchildren come into your life. I'm grateful for everything, especially those moments in play. It takes my breath away!
I just love that, Erica!
I think I'd say to love. To love people, to discover what their most secret fears and their most secret dreams are. I'd say to love their faults, to love their weaknesses, and especially love their vulnerable bits.
And to accept them as they are, respect them as they are, and love them as they are. To see the beauty in every person, because humans are just amazing, fascinating, miraculous beings, even the ones who, at first glance, might seem otherwise. Especially those ones.
Then treat the characters they create the same way. Then write as if they hold their reader's vulnerable bits in their hands. And to always stay sensitive, always allow yourself to be vulnerable, because the most amazing things happen when you open yourself up.
I know it sounds insanely corny, but that's how I think of it.
Many people hate to be alone with their own thoughts. I am the opposite. I crave that time. It restores me. I use my lunch hour every work day to walk around the nearby marina and stare at the boats and water. That calms me for the rest of the day.
You've said it best. I think too often writers feel they must write every single day, and that's fine, but I have to believe that sooner or later the pond dries out and you need to refill. The only way to do that is to take time out for living.
Beautiful post, by the way.
Joe:
I agree that's very often a stage on the way to finding your voice.
E
I'd advice people not to write if they can do absolutely anything else.
I am dreadful at stepping back and just "being." My mind goes too fast. I have to beat myself to slow down. It's not a good way to live. Thanks for the reminder from you and Demon Baby.
KIM
I still remember Mark's comment about "we are asking people to pay for our daydreams."
At the time I thought how profound that was because it never occurred to me that it was ummm arrogant to ask for people to pay for my daydreams but I've since decided that professional daydreamers, the ones who write them down, and then bend and work the words until they create a meaningful daydream in others are people I respect. This is why I pay money for their books.
I love that! And I love what Spy wrote too!
I don't lie on sidewalks, especially in this weather. But I take my dog for walks, unless the weather is crappy. I think dog walking has a similar effect. I don't know if walking indoors or at a mall would be as good for my mind or my soul.
Travis:
I need some of the night dream.
Too many people/stress in my house. Insomnia.
E
LaDonna:
I had to learn to be grateful for moments like that or I would not survive Demon Baby.
E
Suzanne:
I crave it too, which may be because my day-to-day like has little real solitude.
Zoe:
Me, too. But then again, there's no stopping a real writer.
E
Kim:
Nice to "see" you here. Happy holidays to you and your beautiful girls. Hubby, too. :-)
E
Richmond:
Wow . . . very true!!!
E
Edie:
I used to walk five miles a day or so . . . but haven't of late since I wake up so early to write now.
E
Kath:
I agree. There's an awful lot of preaching about x or y, but really, some people just need the downtime.
E
haha yes, cause we're masochistic that way.
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