Barbells and Loco Legs

Yeah . . . bet you can't guess what this post is going to be about. It is the wonder that is Dynamo Boy (the artist formerly known as Demon Baby). See . . . I sometimes wonder if he's going to be a writer.

DB has been sick for a week--stomach virus. And yesterday he was in a lot of pain. Generally, there's not much that sucks worse than your child hurting. So I asked him if I could bring him a cold compress, a heating pad, rub his belly . . . anything. And he said, "No. My stomach feels like there's a barbell inside of it, and I've got a serious case of Loco Legs."

So I've got a 5-year-old kid who creates metaphors/similes and strange maladies using alliteration.

So . . . no cliches . . . what metaphor have you written lately that you are proud of? Like a barbell? Some turn of a phrase? Alliteration? Let's hear it.