Shed
It's January 13th. Almost two weeks into the new year. How are you doing on those resolutions and goals? Was one of them to "write more"?
On the surface of things, there should be virtually no way for me to "fit" writing into my life. Four kids, two parents living with me . . . a lot of steady freelance clients that sometimes severely barge into my fiction time. Deadlines, deadlines. The laundry (constant lament). Chauffeuring duties (first thing I do when I hit the lottery is hire a chauffeur and a laundress).
But for me, and it seems like this year especially, I realize that the only way to have time for the things you love is to shed the things that weigh you down. I write every day, or close to it. And my output is fairly prolific. I've been using the philosophy of shedding for years, but I think in 2010, I forgot it a little. My life got cluttered. So it is with clarity that I remind myself of shedding. And this is what gets cut out.
- Volunteering for ANYTHING that does not fit in with my life purpose, which is loving my children. I volunteer two times a month in Pirate Boy's class for a half-hour or so each time. I am not the class mom, because frankly, I don't give a crap about cupcakes. I care about being with HIM in the classroom. I shed my church this year, which freed up 20 hours a week (give or take). I am not filling that with anything but my kids.
- Fake people and bullsh*t. I don't have TIME for false friends. Social niceties. We're either real friends or don't bother me and go away.
- Mindless anything. I stopped watching late-night TV, which was always about falling asleep with the TV on. I don't do that anymore, but instead go to SLEEP. My parents watch a tremendous amount of television, and I will sit with them, but that is about quality time with them, in essence. I usually am cuddling one or more kids on the couch at the same time, or we play Yahtzee or Scrabble, too. But mindless surfing--nope.
- Internet. Broke myself of the gossip sites and anything but clicking on Facebook (where I get emails, too . . . so . . .). I am perpetually "offline" there, so even if I click on, no one can start a chat with me. Hate to be antisocial, but . . . have to. However, play Scrabble with me! I love it online. (Much to his displeasure, I am sure.)
- Worry. This is something I am working on . . . on a daily basis. It's a time waster and accomplishes nothing. I'm working on it. Like all of us, my life is a work in progress. This is a habit of wasting mind space and thought time I must shed.
- Clutter. In order to make room for all my parents' stuff, I am in the midst of a SERIOUS, no-holds-barred PURGE of clutter. Less clutter means less to clean, dust, and look at.
- Phone calls. I don't answer my phone. Ever. Sorry. I will listen to messages and then email my answer sometimes. I talk to my best friend . . . and a few calls here and there. But I hate the phone. Text me. I will respond.
What will you shed in 2011?
18 comments:
It's a good question. I'm doing fairly well on some of my resolutions, but some of my fiction ones blew up in my face after a discussion with my agent. I send her about 15 pages of a tech thriller I'd played around with and she got back to me in two days, basically saying, write 100 pp and I can send this out. Love it. So that was kind of unexpected.
I'm hoping to shed some types of work I'm not as wild about and substitute it with similar or (hopefully) better paying work that I like a lot more. So that may mean shedding some clients.
I'm hoping to shed some of my distractions, particularly some bad habits re. the Internet. We'll see how that goes.
Mark:
That is very exciting! :-) But that;'s a good kind of problem.
My parents are going back to Florida to pack up the rest of their stuff for the permanent move here in April/May, so my plan is to work like a madwoman on my goals while I have a slightly less full house.
I just submitted a book. If it sells, it will change the end of my year drastically. But I'll worry about that when it happens.
Last year I shed clutter. Cleaned closets, drawers (most of them). I think my mom thinks I'm a bit compulsive now, but it saves me tons of time to not hunt stuff down. It also gives me a bit of peace.
I've shed most people who give me grief, and the ones who still do have some other worth to me, so that's all good. And I've watched nearly no TV in the past few weeks. I've read big books. I've watched some movies.
I too am very careful about how much I volunteer. I do about the same you do. I know since I work at home in my jammies people think I'm not working, but I've learned I have to be very vigilant about not getting sucked in. The other thing, for next year, is this ridiculous background check for the schools (That parents have to pay 20 bucks to do and take time to fill out.) I seriously doubt I'll volunteer next year. We'll see. It's just one of those insidious things that fills time, you know? I have enough of that crap in my life.
Starbucks:
That's what I am feeling about shedding clutter. It will be streamlining my life. Which needs it with two more people moving in my house. :-)
I love this, Erica. I admire the hell out of you for all you can accomplish with everything you've got going on! (I also completely relate to hating the phone. Thought I was the only one!)
This year, I'm working on shedding doubts and analysis paralysis. I've discovered that simply moving a little toward my goals, whether it's the "right move" or not, is better than running around in a circle or trying to plot the perfect map towards whatever I"m trying to accomplish.
Cathy:
I also have shed a little paralysis lately. I just have to push on. Forward momentum builds on itself.
And congrats for starting your writing blog!
Okay, you had me until you started with the crazy talk - get up earlier, what? Haha, I think you are making the choices that are going to make you & the fam happy ... all good. :) xox BB
BB:
Yeah. That early thing. Not so fun. ;-)
I'm adding things to my schedule. I'm going to the gym twice a week. But, I have already cut out TV. I go to bed by 9pm and get up at 5:30am.
Well, I didn't keep any of my resolutions this year - they didn't even last a day, lol. Oh well, it was the thought that counts.
For 2011, I would love to shed some weight (I stopped running in October due to a heel injury and it's caught up with me) and I would love to shed some worry. I worry constantly, especially about things that are out of my control.
So worry, your time is up. No worry in 2011 :)
FF:
I have a friend who does the very early to bed, very early to rise thing. She seems to accomplish so much more in her days, but I do like to socialize with friends a lot, and it seems like with teenagers in the house, too, I can't wrap myself around that schedule. But sometimes I think when I get older I might try it.
Nadine:
We'll be each other's Worry Buddy this year. Tell you what? I'll worry about your stuff for you and you worry about mine. ;-)
If I lose my mind, does that count as shedding unnecessary distractions?
I didn't really do any resolution except write fiction every day. I'm not writing enough of it. I am opening it every day... spent three days this week working on the pitch, but I've been spending more time doing writing that's not fiction... boo hiss :-(
Merry:
You can lose your mind, sure. I lost mine ages ago. ;-)
Maybe I'll pull a Jack and shed all my clothes!
High School.
Worry.
A certain person I spent two years adoring, even though he forgot me in the end.
Doubt.
Old negative philosophies.
Spending so much time on the internet looking at junk that's never as inspiring as I hope it will be.
And last but not least I want to shed the skin I've been wearing for the past four years. I don't need the persona I created for high school anymore. I'm ready for an upgrade.
Here's to 2011!
Jude:
Joining a nudist colony? ;-)
Johnny:
:-) They sound like wonderful and inspiring things to shed this year. Here's to 2011. [clink]
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